I came to eat...

If you've ever seen 'The Fisher King', there's a scene where a neurotic outlines her behaviour at parties:

I don't make an impression on people.
At office parties, I rearrange
the hors d'oeuvres...
...while people are eating them,
so that the platters will remain full.

Whilst I don't paw at the food, I do have a compulsion to tidy up. If there's food left half eaten, lying about, I will scoop it up and throw it into the bin and I would never leave my plate on someone's TV or bookcase.

The thing is, I'm not terribly tidy at home. I could leave a frying pan soaking for a few days before I wash it, I can leave a teaspoon lying on the bench thinking I will reuse it at a later stage, I mean, I just stirred tea with it, it doesn't need a soapy wash. I even go so far as to reuse a juice glass by placing it in the fridge between drinks (so it doesn't attract vermin) and using it all week before it gets a little cloudy and suspect looking.

Nope, it's only at parties. Of course, the main reasons are obvious to me.

1. I never got the concept of a party, of letting loose, having too much to drink and sharing varying stories with strangers. I think I'm too controlling for that and I am the cheapest drunk so I can't drink too much without becoming rather foolish. This means I'm hyper-conscious of dirty plates piling up or a glass of wine balanced precariously on an arm rest.
2. I appreciate the host going to so much work inviting and sharing food and drink with us that I want to return the favour as best I know how. Again, pertaining to my lack of experience in knowing how to act at parties, this should be the last thing on my mind, I mean, that's what the gift is for!
3. I like parties where there's lots of food. To me, a party equates to food, endless food. At parties, I am the quiet one, hovering around the food table, eating all the party pies and snapping up the little quiches and sushi rolls. At the latest party I attended, it was a Curry Laksa Party where guests assembled their own Laksas. There was enough to assemble 2-3 bowls each. To top it off, there were three cakes to choose from afterwards. Ahh, such is bliss.